Question: Sometimes I get so ANGRY!!!

ANGER  

is an emotion that many people have difficulty managing. However, with practice the emotion can be used to your benefit. Below are a few tips to help you understand anger a bit better and embrace it.

#1 - It's ok to feel anger 

Feeling anger isn't "bad" or "wrong". Therefore, there isn't a need to avoid it or try to keep the emotion from arising. It's important to justify anger so that time and energy aren't wasted in an attempt to keep from feeling. All energy that is conserved in this manner will still be available to help direct behavior.

#2 - Be honest about how much anger you feel

 Whenever emotions spike, it becomes more difficult to maintain an ability to think logically. While the feeling of anger may be justified, the more intense the feeling, the harder it will be to make rational decisions.

#3 - Identify the focus of your anger

 This is what many consider to be "what made me mad". If we believe that something or someone else has the power to control our emotions, we also fall into the trap of believing that the responsibility for behavior control lies outside of us. On the other hand, if we understand that the feeling of anger is an inner warning to us that something is wrong, we can appreciate the energy that we experience when we get "mad".

#4 - Decide what you want to do

 This is where you'll either succeed or fail in the management of your behavior. At this point, rather than continuing to focus on what's wrong or what you don't like, it's more helpful to shift your focus towards what you want. This shift in focus will help you identify steps you can takes to increase the likelihood that you'll get what you want.

#5 - Perform regular self care

This is where you get to treat yourself! The energy we experience when we feel anger takes us out of our emotional equilibrium. If after an experience we have lingering angry energy, that energy begins to affect many other aspects of our lives and may cause some unwanted consequences. Self-care is a routine of deliberate acts to bring joy into your life, so that the joyous energy will help you to return to an emotional state that helps you to enjoy life.